FIFTEEN YEARS

I gave birth to my oldest child in the year nineteen ninety.
My daughter was the best thing to have ever happened to me. She was beautiful and she was definitely the apple of my eye.
She still is.

From when I first became pregnant I was forced to go it alone. My boyfriend wanted nothing to do with me nor the baby.
I will never say it was easy.
I had to respect his decision and, therefore, he mine.

My doctors had previously indicated that I would never be able to have children of my own, so when I discovered that I was with child, I was ecstatic with joy.
To me it was no less than a miracle!
I was thirty-three and well aware of the very loud ticking emanating from my biological clock.

After my little girl was born, I realised how she helped create so much more purpose to my life.

Since then, I was able to further my education, resulting in a love for the work I do.
We have settled into a wonderful community in a beautiful valley in the mountains.
Twelve years ago we met a wonderful man with whom we now share our lives.
We have been blessed with two more lovely children since.

We are now in the presence of a teenager...
Where did my lovely little girl go?
I know she is in there somewhere!

At the moment, our lives are a rollercoaster.
An undulating mix of love, worry, anger and any other emotion that can be tossed in for good measure.
I am a firm believer in Karma - or call it what you like.
Yin and Yang, what goes around comes around, payback time...

We can only trust that deep inside she has learned the lessons that we have shown her.
That she really understands that we love her and that we want her to be happy, healthy, safe and successful.
This is the proverbial "cutting of the apron strings".
We have to let her go.
But at the same time she will know there is a loving, caring, safe and comfortable place to come home to.

Much can happen in fifteen years...

It is a lifetime for our beautiful daughter.